Total And Complete Infidelity Survival

The desire to "leave it all in the past" is a natural and understandable part of human nature That applies to anything negative and/or unpleasant that happens to trouble us. Especially so, and understandable when an affair is involved.Confronting the truth that a person you loved and trusted a loved one you had confidence in, could inflict such pain on you. Wanting to erase your memory of all this pain and negativity is only natural.You never thought anything like this could ever happen. But now that it has, your driving motivation is the logical, human one. To "put it all behind you."

You want, to use that overused modern word - "closure." You want to not be reminded of the pain and resentment. Not to have to deal with the self doubt. Not to be haunted by the nightmare images of your partner's affair.

Understandable. But the problem, and the reality, can be found in the title of one of Dali's most celebrated paintings - "The Persistence Of Memory." If we consider money first of all, it's apparent that money doesn't discriminate. That is to say, it does the same job for everyone, regardless of the color of their skin or social position.

It's the same with memory. Like money, memory doesn't discriminate. It stores both the good and bad. Happy and sad. Important and mundane. It's all there. And, short of a lobotomy - you're never going to erase it.

remove a roadblock is to attempt to control it. Is it not? Or, in the case of affair

survival, attempting to control the way in which it affects you.

One of the avenues you may want to explore is hypnosis. Although it is true that hypnosis doesn't work for everyone, if you have life paralyzing memory problems, hypnosis is definitely something you should at least consider.

The operative technique in this case is what hypnotists call "reversing the connotation." A fancy way of saying "turning an unhappy memory association into a happy one." For instance, if the hypnotist suggests that each time you hear the word "affair", you'll be reminded of your happiest vacation. Much better than a lobotomy, don't you think?

On the negative side of the ledger, hypnosis will not be of any help if you have a strong resistance to the idea that it could help. So, if that's you, hypnosis is not the way to go.

Realizing and accepting that you will never be able to totally erase the negative thoughts and images, is the first step to advancing. But, and here's the second step, by focusing on you, on rebuilding your self-respect and confidence, the haunting memories will progressively fade. As you, equally progress with rebuilding your life, hour by hour, day by day.

If you focus on you - as you must if you truly want to survive and heal - the painful memories will have no entry point or time to trouble you.

I am one of those people who was not helped by hypnosis.Although my will to be treated was positive.



The author is the survivor of a traumatic affair who urges all those trying to survive an affair to to get professional counselling from this free resource.